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How to Not Hate Your Job. . .Or Any Other Situation You Can't Stand

7/23/2021

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Photo by Matthew Henry on Unsplash
You hate your job. If hate is too strong a sentiment, you intensely dislike your job. Doesn't matter if it's full-time or part-time, you just know this ain't it. Perhaps you work in retail and you've decreased your hours to the point that you're only working one weekend a month. But you still hate it. Perhaps you've decreased your 40-hour/week job to 20 hours.  But you still dislike it intensely.

You lose sleep over this. You ruminate over how much you wish you were elsewhere, even though you don't know where that "else" is. You keep thinking you have to make a change. You keep telling yourself to stop wasting time. You keep feeling this urgency. 

You've built so much internal pressure that no wonder you're not sleeping well. No wonder you're overeating. No wondering you're overusing the Hulu, Prime Video, and Netflix.

I'm speaking from mad experience here.

So how do you relieve this pressure even if you're nowhere close to leaving the situation?

With one sentence: You're okay.
 

What?! 

Ever seen a loving caretaker assuage an emotionally distressed child? They cradle the child. They gently rub the child's back. They whisper encouragement into the child's ear.

When you experience the level of intensity described above, you are an emotionally distressed human.

Be that loving caretaker to yourself.

I've alleviated lots of upsets on a range of matters by literally rubbing my hand to my chest, rocking myself to and fro, and telling myself "You're OK." I know lots of other people who do this. I've coached and mentored others to do this too.

It works. With consistent practice.

Self-soothing does not eliminate the fact that you will leave this job. The desire to create a better work scenario is valid and true. And, let's ebb the internal aggression that manifests in insomnia, weight gain, and strained relationships. You have more power over this than you realize. And it starts with your mind and how you treat yourself.

Part of the self-assuaging is gradually disappearing the word "hate" from your vocabulary. Observe and catch how many times you say to yourself, "I hate my job. I hate my job. I hate this. I hate that." Notice how you feel after every utterance. Terrible!

So instead try any of the following statements to mitigate the emotional geyser. Or create your own.
  • I'm not a fan of this job.
  • I'm not really into this.
  • I would like another job.
  • I look forward to a different experience.

Calm yourself.

You know another benefit of alleviating the pressure? You’ll be of clearer head and sounder mind to envision and follow through on your next career or business-creation move. Taking action from an urgent, and often rash, state of mind will most likely create a worse scenario than the one you’re in.

​Don't do that to yourself.

You're OK.

Breathe.

Mindfully take your next step.

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I help dissatisfied office professionals create careers, businesses, and lives they love by prioritizing their personal wellness. If you resonate with this article, complete this questionnaire for a spot to receive kick-ass one-on-one coaching. I’ve been where you are and I know what it takes to generate the change you seek.

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    Author

    My name's Valerie and I'm a Certified Life Coach with a background in teaching dance as well as facilitating diversity, equity, and inclusion professional development conversations and workshops.

    If you're a woman of color (especially a Black woman!) then I'm here to support and guide you in feeling good about yourself and speaking up often in order to create a  career and LIFE you'll love.

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