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Give Yourself Permission to Have the Professional Life You Want

12/31/2021

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As long as your satisfied with the above reality, keep on with it. 

If it's working for you, don't change anything. But if it's not how you want your work life to be, know that you have options.

Your job can be a source of profound meaning in your life.

You can be passionate about your job assignments and responsibilities.

You can enjoy hanging out with your co-workers on the weekend. They can become like family.

Your work can have a positive impact on social, political, and environmental causes you care about.

I know these CANs are possible because I've lived them.

I've experienced the before of hating past admin office jobs for every reason listed in the image above.

And I've experienced the after of confiding in my co-workers with deep and meaningful shit because I really liked and trusted them as people.

The after of happily researching the coaching, arts education, and DEI fields off the clock because I'm passionate about these topics. And I know my work makes a positive impact.

So the question is: Will you give yourself permission to have the professional life you want?

If your answer is yes, then take an immediate concrete step towards pursuing this reality.
  • Create a pinterest board with images reflecting the professional life you want.
  • Schedule a meeting with your boss to discuss lateral and/or vertical growth possibilities at your workplace. 
  • Update your resume and/or LinkedIn profile.
  • Write your ideal job description and spare no details. (One of my ideals was wearing workout clothes on the job. I now work as a dance educator and wear workout clothes to work most days).
  • Book a life coaching consultation with me. We'll discuss finding and flourishing your dream career in under a year, while keeping your self-care on point and having a social life.

It doesn't matter what step you take. What's important is that you take A step.

Then another. Then the next.

And keep going, until your mission is accomplished.

But, what if your answer to giving yourself permission is "no"?
Well, the first step to change is awareness.
So think of it as a great thing that you've uncovered an honest answer to this question.
With awareness you can start to change.

I created my first personal development course in 2009. The third chapter in that course is "Give Yourself Permission." 
Read or listen to it here and get on path to being a YES on that self-permission front.

If you're ready to accelerate your dream career in under a year (and excel your self-care and social life), then seriously consider weekly life coaching sessions for at least 9 months. 
Book Your Consultation Now
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Choose Your Discomfort

12/24/2021

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But check this out . . . you're already uncomfortable.

You're uncomfortable with how much you hate what you're currently doing.

You're comfortable about your relationship with your boss and co-workers.

You're uncomfortable with how much you feel like you don't belong here because the job and you just aren't a good fit.

You're uncomfortable with the hours, the commute, the monotony, the lack of creativity.

You're taking longer lunch breaks.

You find any excuse to get out of the office.

You count down every hour until you get to leave.

You think it's safe to stay where you are because it's comfortable receiving a reliable paycheck.
It's comfortable getting that matched 401K.
Having health insurance is comfortable.

So you hem and haw about leaving...until 2 more years go by and you're as miserable as ever.

So you stall the decision to leave.

Hear me though.

Making the decision to leave, or create a different job for yourself at your current work (yes, that is possible) does not mean you have to leave tomorrow.

Relax.
Making a clear decision means you're programming your brain to find solutions to better your situation.


You can give yourself as much time as you want to turn in your resignation, or to create your ideal job description at your current job, talk to your boss and explore the possibility of doing that instead.

But make the decision.
Get out of limbo land.
Purgatory is an unnecessary pain.



  • I will resign in 6 months.
  • I will schedule a meeting with my boss 2 weeks from now to discuss vertical or lateral growth opportunities.
  • I am leaving this position no matter what.

Feel the power of your DECISION. 
Then get to work.
Give yourself as much time as you need to make the changes.

And if you want weekly one-on-one guidance, accountability, and support to follow through on your decision, then I'd be happy to help. I've been there. 

Book your life coaching consultation now.
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My Birthday Gift to You: Your 2022 Dreams and Goals

12/17/2021

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Today is my birthday and I am kicking ass with love and gentleness. Honestly, I was not looking forward to this day just a few short weeks ago.

But I've been having conversations with my life coaches (yes, I have more than one) and doing my inner work to reach the point where I am jazzed to honor and celebrate my day and to share it with loved ones, not just on my actual date, but throughout this month.

I'm reflecting on my desires, dreams, goals, and visions...for the next 20 years and for the next 365 days.

Even though it's my birthday, I'm thinking about you and your dreams for 2022 and beyond.
So I have a special gift for you.

But first...
  • Do you have a clear vision for what you want next year to look like?
  • Is your vision fueled by your authentic dreams and desires?
  • Have you created powerful goals to align you with your vision?
  • Do you feel good about entering 2022?
  • ​
You do NOT have to figure all this out on your own.

Actually, it's NOT a good idea to go it alone.

And so here's my gift.

​For the next two weeks I'm offering you a FREE one-off
KickAss New Year Strategy Session 
During your 60-minute session, I will help you set goals for 2022 and create a feel-good plan to achieve them. We will bust through your biggest fears and blocks. We will vocalize your desires and dreams. We will paint the picture of your vision.

No strings attached.
Schedule Your Free Strategy Session Now

​And if you wonder what in the hell the difference is between a dream, desire, vision, and goal, watch the video below. Note, you do NOT need to watch this in order to book your session.
​
P.S. When I recorded the video, I said that visions and dreams were synonymous. As I've reflected on this, I've shifted my stance. There is some nuance. And we can talk all about it during your strategy session!


Don't think you'll come back to this post later.
​

You won't.

Don't tell yourself you should do this, but then do nothing.

If you feel fluttery sensations, book your session.

If you feel drawn to this, but scared, book your session.

If you're saying, "I want to do this, but...", book your session.

Don't talk yourself out of doing what could be one of the best things you've done for yourself all year.

The time to act is now.

Your life is worth it. You are worth it.

I can't wait to speak with you!
Book Your Session Now
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Why Your Job Sucks Part 2

12/10/2021

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Your job sucks because your work relationships be strugglin'!

You're not connecting with your colleagues.

You currently connect with them inauthentically.

Or you don't connect with them at all.

When I worked in office jobs I couldn't stand, I bolted during my lunch breaks.
  • "These people can't relate to me."
  • "And I don't relate them to."
  • "Why would I want to spend any more time than necessary around them?"

I was more interested in getting the hell up out of there than to see these people as valuable humans.
These beings that I shared so much space and time with.

You may say, "Meh, it doesn't matter."

But it does matter.

When I started having lunch with my co-workers, going to happy hour, taking walk-n-talk breaks with them, getting to know 'em, AND letting them know me..my job didn't suck so much.

Feeling connected contributed to a delicious sense of well-being.

Stop holding your well-being hostage.

Stop isolating. 
  • Say yes the next time the group invites you to lunch.
  • Ask your supe about their personal goals in 5 years.
  • Take a 10-min walking break with that chill person on the 4th floor.
  • Tell your project partner why you started painting.

After all this you may still dislike your job, but it won't suck the way it does now.

And you never know...your next job lead could come from one of your co-workers.

I'd love to help you with personalized guidance to create kickass connections at work WHILE we create and execute your exit plan into your new career.
Let's schedule your consultation.

​P.S. Read Why Your Job Sucks Part 1 here.

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Why Your Job Sucks

12/7/2021

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You have great ideas. 
Stop telling yourself you don't.

I know it's scary to act on that light-bulb moment you had last month.

That moment when you knew you could create a more efficient system for your and your department's workflow.

What if you present the idea to your boss and they shoot you down?

Or what if your co-workers say, "Who do you think you are to go changing things like this? You're just a ___."

But by not speaking up and sharing what you have to offer, you feel TEN times WORSE than what you would feel if your co-workers said that thing and your boss said no to your idea.

Try this.

Go ahead and create the system. Put your idea into action.
Create the prototype.
Experiment with the possibility. 
Show that it works.

THEN bring the implemented idea to your boss.

At that point, even if they're still a no, you've given yourself the gift of acknowledging and expressing yourself.
And that is estimable.
That is admirable.

You'll be so proud of yourself.

Your originality matters.
Your contributions matter.
You matter.

And...you may get all this intellectually.

Yet taking up space like this on the regular might be downright frightening.

There's nothing wrong with you that you can't will yourself into taking initiative and shining your brilliance.

There's something to be said for social conditioning about who can and can't be visible and successful in the workplace.

Conditioning around gender, sexuality, race, ability, neurodiversity . . . 

That's where I come in.

My work as a Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Facilitator and Educator informs the coaching we'll do together as we consider the context and specific challenges you've experienced being anything other than traditional status quo (white, straight, cisgender, male, able-bodied, etc.)

Let's factor in ALL of your personal and generational experiences in a one-on-one coaching container so that you kick ass at work, implementing idea after idea, getting your well-earned promotion, and being an example of what's possible.

Hit me up HERE for some kickass coaching.

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    Author

    My name's Valerie and I'm a Certified Life Coach with a background in teaching dance as well as facilitating diversity, equity, and inclusion professional development conversations and workshops.

    If you're a woman of color (especially a Black woman!) then I'm here to support and guide you in feeling good about yourself and speaking up often in order to create a  career and LIFE you'll love.

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